








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 223 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 192 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,461 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3039 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1590 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 3020 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2812 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $933,732 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 375 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kreom | 43% | 127 |
| #5 | Bottomfrag | 41% | 83 |
| #6 | Thor oh oh oUoh | 35% | 20 |
| #7 | Shano | 32% | 72 |
| #8 | Ⓛ𝕌𝓒𝓚ⓎⓈ𝓗O𝕋 | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cobra | 16 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Kreom | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Bottomfrag | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Shano | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | GBZ_HÆNGEDAL21 | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bottomfrag | 140 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | Shano | 68 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | Kreom | 67 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | Thor oh oh oUoh | 48 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | GBZ_HÆNGEDAL21 | 41 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cobra | +4.30 | 56 | 47 |
| #2 | GBZ_HÆNGEDAL21 | +2.29 | 60 | 65 |
| #3 | Thor oh oh oUoh | +1.78 | 67 | 59 |
| #4 | Ⓛ𝕌𝓒𝓚ⓎⓈ𝓗O𝕋 | +1.61 | 24 | 38 |
| #5 | Kreom | +1.23 | 64 | 38 |





