








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 938 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 627 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4482 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,688 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1078 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1268 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 435 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 907 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $771,760 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jwe. | 49% | 214 |
| #2 | Dickota | 47% | 562 |
| #3 | Raven | 47% | 392 |
| #4 | Zank | 45% | 200 |
| #5 | DynoMax | 44% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Dickota | 47% | 562 |
| #3 | Raven | 47% | 392 |
| #4 | Zank | 45% | 200 |
| #5 | DynoMax | 44% | 101 |
| #6 | Darkzee13 | 40% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dickota | 111 | 0.0093 |
| #2 | Raven | 59 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | DynoMax | 29 | 0.0138 |
| #4 | jwe. | 24 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | Zank | 18 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jwe. | 785 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #2 | Raven | 604 | 0.07 | 16 min |
| #3 | Dickota | 406 | 0.03 | 8 min |
| #4 | Zank | 227 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | DynoMax | 193 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jwe. | +2.65 | 58 | 49 |
| #2 | DynoMax | +1.72 | 48 | 43 |
| #3 | Raven | +0.69 | 36 | 42 |
| #4 | Dickota | +0.55 | 68 | 48 |
| #5 | Zank | -1.14 | 35 | 39 |





