










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
249 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 637 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 220 | 35% |
| Smokes | 139 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 168 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 110 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $100,512 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ✯Mards | 20% | 5 |
| #8 | Käkelänkommodori | 17% | 6 |
| #9 | Unnis | 0% | 2 |
| #10 | oliVertigo | 0% | 4 |
| #11 | Ola | 0% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Käkelänkommodori | 3 | 0.0229 |
| #2 | ✯Mards | 3 | 0.0280 |
| #3 | job applicationPEEK | 2 | 0.0154 |
| #4 | Lightning | 2 | 0.0244 |
| #5 | Yömyssy | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Käkelänkommodori | 25 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #2 | job applicationPEEK | 23 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | Yömyssy | 19 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | Lightning | 17 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #5 | ADROZ | 16 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Unnis | +8.26 | 96 | 44 |
| #2 | nahkarukkanen | +3.47 | 69 | 52 |
| #3 | job applicationPEEK | -0.24 | 41 | 61 |
| #4 | ADROZ | -0.73 | 70 | 74 |
| #5 | Käkelänkommodori | -1.74 | 16 | 65 |





