








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 26 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
271 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 508 | 35% |
| Smokes | 246 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 298 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 404 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $42,448 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✡ Moking ✡ | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | GummyMan | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Sababa | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | swish1wish(fushi) | 56% | 45 |
| #5 | Raylond | 55% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✡ Moking ✡ | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | GummyMan | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Sababa | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | swish1wish(fushi) | 56% | 45 |
| #5 | Raylond | 55% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swish1wish(fushi) | 12 | 0.0130 |
| #2 | Sababa | 10 | 0.0198 |
| #3 | Raylond | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | ✡ Moking ✡ | 1 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | GummyMan | 1 | 0.0164 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raylond | 119 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | swish1wish(fushi) | 69 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Sababa | 56 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | ✡ Moking ✡ | 47 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | GummyMan | 15 | 0.25 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✡ Moking ✡ | +10.83 | 90 | 84 |
| #2 | swish1wish(fushi) | +3.95 | 69 | 53 |
| #3 | Raylond | +3.28 | 50 | 61 |
| #4 | GummyMan | +2.49 | 42 | 48 |
| #5 | Sababa | -4.12 | 4 | 28 |





