








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 233 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 40 | 17% |
| Smokes | 31 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 81 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 81 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $9,857 of utility $7 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dookie | 42% | 52 |
| #2 | milianmx | 33% | 21 |
| #3 | Heady_Lele | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dookie | 42% | 52 |
| #2 | milianmx | 33% | 21 |
| #3 | Heady_Lele | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dookie | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | milianmx | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dookie | 86 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | milianmx | 46 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Heady_Lele | 1 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dookie | +1.69 | 74 | 52 |
| #2 | schmiddywerbenjagermainhighping | -1.82 | 32 | 12 |
| #3 | milianmx | -3.05 | 33 | 57 |
| #4 | Heady_Lele | -6.34 | 34 | 3 |





