








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2004 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1656 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




79 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 89,627 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12773 | 14% |
| Smokes | 30307 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 20171 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 26376 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,110,427 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2333 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | _Maayk.__ | 48% | 208 |
| #5 | p1mple | 44% | 149 |
| #6 | QOxO | 43% | 240 |
| #7 | BM4-TheWorstPlayer | 42% | 182 |
| #8 | AG- | 42% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QOxO | 30 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | AG- | 22 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | RAW | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | BM4-TheWorstPlayer | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | p1mple | 6 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _Maayk.__ | 526 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #2 | QOxO | 447 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | p1mple | 349 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | BM4-TheWorstPlayer | 309 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | HELL GATES | 298 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AG- | +3.22 | 58 | 59 |
| #2 | HELL GATES | +0.97 | 35 | 59 |
| #3 | RAW | +0.93 | 47 | 47 |
| #4 | p1mple | +0.30 | 51 | 57 |
| #5 | _Maayk.__ | +0.05 | 64 | 53 |





