








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 749 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 422 matches | ||
| Wingman | 103 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




102 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6985 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,432 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5099 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4873 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 7641 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 5819 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,354,245 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 613 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr0nen | 60% | 47 |
| #2 | Fredbaand | 57% | 93 |
| #3 | Ng1nx | 56% | 101 |
| #4 | Eghøj | 56% | 43 |
| #5 | Sk1pz | 53% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ListePikken... | 31 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | RaLLe | 11 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Sk1pz | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Ng1nx | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | SoFlos.Dk | 8 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ListePikken... | 754 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #2 | Sk1pz | 485 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | Ng1nx | 291 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #4 | Classicfr3ddy | 264 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | Fredbaand | 249 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ng1nx | +2.37 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | Dr0nen | +1.84 | 91 | 69 |
| #3 | RaLLe | +1.69 | 77 | 50 |
| #4 | Arr0w | +1.10 | 72 | 60 |
| #5 | SoFlos.Dk | +0.93 | 74 | 65 |





