








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 807 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2848 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,846 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2450 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2854 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1654 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1888 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,435,319 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generalen | 48% | 90 |
| #2 | cookiez | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | E-Skillarn | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generalen | 48% | 90 |
| #2 | cookiez | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | E-Skillarn | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generalen | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | E-Skillarn | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | cookiez | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generalen | 292 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | cookiez | 114 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | E-Skillarn | 42 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cookiez | +2.70 | 83 | 70 |
| #2 | Generalen | +0.90 | 86 | 72 |
| #3 | Zergz | +0.83 | 77 | 54 |
| #4 | E-Skillarn | -1.01 | 85 | 55 |





