








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 130 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1083 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,127 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1822 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2216 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1798 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1291 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $242,695 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | 51% | 79 |
| #2 | Snorlax | 38% | 32 |
| #3 | Mor_kill | 32% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | 51% | 79 |
| #2 | Snorlax | 38% | 32 |
| #3 | Mor_kill | 32% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Snorlax | 7 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | Mor_kill | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | 228 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | Snorlax | 84 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Mor_kill | 7 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob | +4.51 | 74 | 72 |
| #2 | Snorlax | -1.36 | 68 | 59 |
| #3 | Frosti | -2.16 | 29 | 60 |
| #4 | Mor_kill | -4.37 | 45 | 9 |





