








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 224 matches | ||
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,500 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3182 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2992 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 6180 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 3146 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,299,309 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3343 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kozzig | 55% | 166 |
| #2 | AllGood | 54% | 95 |
| #3 | Chunk | 53% | 394 |
| #4 | Denny | 52% | 315 |
| #5 | brayden_z32 | 47% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | AllGood | 54% | 95 |
| #3 | Chunk | 53% | 394 |
| #4 | Denny | 52% | 315 |
| #5 | brayden_z32 | 47% | 165 |
| #6 | nrma | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nrma | 39 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Denny | 35 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Chunk | 17 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | AllGood | 15 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | kozzig | 9 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chunk | 308 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #2 | nrma | 266 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | brayden_z32 | 230 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | kozzig | 196 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | AllGood | 104 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AllGood | +3.61 | 80 | 56 |
| #2 | Denny | +3.10 | 87 | 31 |
| #3 | Chunk | +2.79 | 82 | 54 |
| #4 | MagzClassical | -0.09 | 66 | 52 |
| #5 | kozzig | -0.56 | 52 | 49 |





