








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 697 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 337 matches | ||
| Faceit | 206 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2422 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3416 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3799 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3142 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,008,986 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 591 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Zoom | 51% | 76 |
| #3 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 51% | 39 |
| #4 | Tektow | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | SAC | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Zoom | 51% | 76 |
| #3 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 51% | 39 |
| #4 | Tektow | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | SAC | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tektow | 6 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Zoom | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SAC | 224 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | Zoom | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Tektow | 78 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 76 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | 75 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zoom | +2.56 | 61 | 45 |
| #2 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | +1.60 | 85 | 58 |
| #3 | UndeadTiger | -0.06 | 56 | 44 |
| #4 | Tektow | -0.67 | 49 | 58 |
| #5 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | -0.80 | 43 | 48 |





