








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1944 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,282 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 303 | 9% |
| Smokes | 728 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 996 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1255 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $525,948 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Crimson Emzz~ | 58% | 19 |
| #5 | Prufrock | 55% | 44 |
| #6 | Zyrn | 53% | 15 |
| #7 | JohnScout2009 | 53% | 68 |
| #8 | frog highlights compilation #84 | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JohnScout2009 | 329 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | feli the dae | 230 | 0.28 | 6 min |
| #3 | Prufrock | 210 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #4 | Zyrn | 99 | 0.31 | 2 min |
| #5 | bearholdnshark | 43 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feli the dae | +3.24 | 71 | 61 |
| #2 | Crimson Emzz~ | +2.39 | 80 | 35 |
| #3 | Kobba | +2.03 | 65 | 36 |
| #4 | Zyrn | +2.03 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | bearholdnshark | +2.02 | 58 | 17 |





