








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1354 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,638 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1136 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1641 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1689 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1172 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $417,844 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BIGPOPPAPUMP | 57% | 51 |
| #2 | Theurbanhitman | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | HabibTFC | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | Alan | 46% | 80 |
| #5 | iPurrple | 46% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | AzureIce | 44% | 39 |
| #9 | Duff | 38% | 117 |
| #10 | Senquisha | 36% | 75 |
| #11 | ndot | 24% | 17 |
| #12 | snoah | 23% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Senquisha | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Fin | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Duff | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Alan | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | iPurrple | 4 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iPurrple | 238 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | Senquisha | 220 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Alan | 204 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | Fin | 134 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | AzureIce | 114 | 0.14 | 2 min |





