








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,432 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3149 | 42% |
| Smokes | 394 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 1986 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1903 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $274,556 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 888 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | happy mouse with 2 scroll wheel | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Dashicle | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | JCoL | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Blurify | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | flabjoe | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | happy mouse with 2 scroll wheel | 757 | 0.19 | 21 min |
| #2 | JCoL | 168 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Blurify | 142 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Dashicle | 118 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | flabjoe | 106 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlie | +2.81 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | Grayons | +2.21 | 68 | 51 |
| #3 | Dashicle | +2.08 | 73 | 58 |
| #4 | happy mouse with 2 scroll wheel | +0.46 | 81 | 65 |
| #5 | JCoL | -0.55 | 68 | 58 |





