








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3103 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1431 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2547 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2229 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2556 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,221,282 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 612 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | awes0mej0ke | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | Venom | 59% | 58 |
| #3 | Laurence Fishburne | 54% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | awes0mej0ke | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | Venom | 59% | 58 |
| #3 | Laurence Fishburne | 54% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venom | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Laurence Fishburne | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | awes0mej0ke | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venom | 64 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #2 | awes0mej0ke | 36 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Laurence Fishburne | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venom | +1.63 | 81 | 44 |
| #2 | Laurence Fishburne | +1.47 | 71 | 58 |
| #3 | Avatar Aang | +0.74 | 66 | 48 |
| #4 | awes0mej0ke | -0.50 | 77 | 68 |





