








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1102 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1458 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,619 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 701 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1477 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1319 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1122 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $758,243 of utility $242 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FreakForLove | 80% | 50 |
| #2 | ♿ Ocean Spray | 76% | 49 |
| #3 | Masterbateman | 71% | 63 |
| #4 | Troo | 69% | 26 |
| #5 | Perhky | 69% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FreakForLove | 202 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | Moose | 124 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♿ Ocean Spray | 59 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Masterbateman | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Troo | 44 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NTZ | +6.57 | 81 | 59 |
| #2 | Perhky | +4.08 | 75 | 54 |
| #3 | Moose | +1.46 | 47 | 40 |
| #4 | Troo | +1.40 | 47 | 51 |
| #5 | FreakForLove | +0.38 | 41 | 55 |





