








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 213 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3381 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2496 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3284 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2230 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $908,757 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1362 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SHAQ | 77% | 31 |
| #2 | pung | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | cosmo kramer | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Mushi | 54% | 65 |
| #5 | andersson | 50% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | pung | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | cosmo kramer | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Mushi | 54% | 65 |
| #5 | andersson | 50% | 170 |
| #6 | KallesYEET | 49% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | andersson | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Mushi | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | cosmo kramer | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | SHAQ | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | pung | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mushi | 268 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #2 | cosmo kramer | 138 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | andersson | 96 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #4 | KallesYEET | 92 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | SHAQ | 40 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hit666 | +3.39 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | Mushi | +1.16 | 64 | 72 |
| #3 | pung | +0.59 | 52 | 51 |
| #4 | cosmo kramer | -0.19 | 56 | 73 |
| #5 | SHAQ | -0.65 | 54 | 57 |





