








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
932 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 279 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 26 | 9% |
| Smokes | 59 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 127 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 67 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $18,686 of utility $6 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cybopig | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Joryha | 57% | 168 |
| #3 | Actual | 50% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cybopig | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Joryha | 57% | 168 |
| #3 | Actual | 50% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Actual | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Joryha | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joryha | 205 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #2 | Actual | 91 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Cybopig | 72 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joryha | +5.62 | 74 | 43 |
| #2 | Cybopig | +4.55 | 62 | 61 |
| #3 | Actual | -0.86 | 65 | 58 |
| #4 | Garou | -2.51 | 42 | 12 |





