








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 130 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2176 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,259 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2320 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2123 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1470 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2346 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $683,287 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hopodopolis | 59% | 69 |
| #2 | Alexzy | 57% | 79 |
| #3 | EEp_in | 48% | 110 |
| #4 | Almighty B | 46% | 76 |
| #5 | Pauletto11 | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hopodopolis | 59% | 69 |
| #2 | Alexzy | 57% | 79 |
| #3 | EEp_in | 48% | 110 |
| #4 | Almighty B | 46% | 76 |
| #5 | Pauletto11 | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hopodopolis | 12 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Almighty B | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | EEp_in | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Pauletto11 | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Alexzy | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EEp_in | 437 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Alexzy | 214 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | Almighty B | 164 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | hopodopolis | 121 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Pauletto11 | 76 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EEp_in | +1.36 | 61 | 59 |
| #2 | hopodopolis | +1.14 | 75 | 50 |
| #3 | Maple | +0.50 | 73 | 62 |
| #4 | Alexzy | +0.27 | 70 | 51 |
| #5 | Pauletto11 | -0.47 | 46 | 55 |





