








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
383 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 244 | 23% |
| Smokes | 300 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 385 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 149 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $83,665 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | madtoad | +8.20 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | Minty | +2.21 | 81 | 37 |
| #3 | Flashy | +1.14 | 81 | 72 |
| #4 | areim | -1.22 | 53 | 57 |
| #5 | Nexus | -1.64 | 66 | 48 |





