








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 481 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1655 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,342 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1553 | 24% |
| Smokes | 963 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1973 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1853 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,764 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MichaelXJ | | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | fad3d_knight | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | IlhAnimal | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | KEZA | 49% | 63 |
| #5 | WideHardo | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MichaelXJ | | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | fad3d_knight | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | IlhAnimal | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | KEZA | 49% | 63 |
| #5 | WideHardo | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEZA | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | fad3d_knight | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | IlhAnimal | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | MichaelXJ | | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEZA | 206 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | IlhAnimal | 61 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | MichaelXJ | | 44 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | WideHardo | 22 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | fad3d_knight | 17 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MichaelXJ | | +5.58 | 72 | 56 |
| #2 | ✪ MB | +0.97 | 68 | 57 |
| #3 | KEZA | -0.79 | 51 | 49 |
| #4 | WideHardo | -1.52 | 44 | 40 |
| #5 | fad3d_knight | -2.83 | 21 | 26 |





