








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 537 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 300 matches | ||
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4709 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,919 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9836 | 49% |
| Smokes | 4235 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3109 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2739 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,482,490 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 421 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Tuuso | 52% | 116 |
| #11 | 𝖘𝖓𝖔𝖜𝖞 | 46% | 39 |
| #12 | julses💭 | 42% | 67 |
| #13 | Meikä kantasuomalainen | 42% | 60 |
| #14 | Macoome | 34% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julses💭 | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | Tuuso | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Kalaksi | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Meikä kantasuomalainen | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | homo | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BirDie | 733 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | draX | 589 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #3 | n3xs*lel | 348 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #4 | Mikeleke | 280 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | Tuuso | 185 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BirDie | +2.96 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | homo | +2.55 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | huan | +1.45 | 83 | 62 |
| #4 | Meikä kantasuomalainen | +0.90 | 50 | 40 |
| #5 | n3xs*lel | +0.48 | 59 | 60 |





