








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 225 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
948 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,010 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 374 | 19% |
| Smokes | 513 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 342 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 781 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $415,485 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Spartanoob11777 | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | Peas & Rice | 40% | 15 |
| #8 | Heidemarie W. Schnaufer | 36% | 14 |
| #9 | Curry Goat | 33% | 9 |
| #10 | Kza | 0% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spartanoob11777 | 4 | 0.0225 |
| #2 | Heidemarie W. Schnaufer | 3 | 0.0106 |
| #3 | computerfreaker | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Pixl | 2 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | Plutiana | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | outwit | +7.99 | 88 | 45 |
| #2 | ExoBlazeGamer | +2.63 | 46 | 45 |
| #3 | Kza | -1.41 | 55 | 50 |
| #4 | Heidemarie W. Schnaufer | -1.57 | 14 | 26 |
| #5 | Plutiana | -1.93 | 44 | 16 |





