










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,981 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1108 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1343 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1195 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 335 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $227,676 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iiTrappinq | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Rokkvi | 70% | 44 |
| #3 | 星街すいせい | 67% | 15 |
| #4 | emilya | 64% | 56 |
| #5 | Sir Picklewiggle von Snortlebum | 63% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Rokkvi | 70% | 44 |
| #3 | 星街すいせい | 67% | 15 |
| #4 | emilya | 64% | 56 |
| #5 | Sir Picklewiggle von Snortlebum | 63% | 54 |
| #6 | NijN | 56% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rokkvi | 22 | 0.0264 |
| #2 | Sir Picklewiggle von Snortlebum | 13 | 0.0121 |
| #3 | 星街すいせい | 4 | 0.0143 |
| #4 | emilya | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NijN | 138 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | Rokkvi | 137 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | emilya | 87 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sir Picklewiggle von Snortlebum | 82 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | 星街すいせい | 43 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rokkvi | +4.50 | 61 | 69 |
| #2 | 星街すいせい | +1.98 | 74 | 40 |
| #3 | Sir Picklewiggle von Snortlebum | +1.71 | 56 | 53 |
| #4 | DaZ | +0.92 | 64 | 60 |
| #5 | NijN | +0.86 | 79 | 51 |





