








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1253 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,963 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 806 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1399 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 841 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 917 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,995 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XON/\REZ | 69% | 29 |
| #2 | Soniax | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | kennyVAC | 60% | 43 |
| #4 | Wilhard | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | 6ix9ine | 58% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XON/\REZ | 69% | 29 |
| #2 | Soniax | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | kennyVAC | 60% | 43 |
| #4 | Wilhard | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | 6ix9ine | 58% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 6ix9ine | 6 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | kennyVAC | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | XON/\REZ | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Wilhard | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wilhard | 81 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | XON/\REZ | 73 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | kennyVAC | 17 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Soniax | 16 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | 6ix9ine | 14 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Derp | +2.64 | 80 | 63 |
| #2 | XON/\REZ | +1.95 | 69 | 56 |
| #3 | kennyVAC | +1.48 | 92 | 30 |
| #4 | 6ix9ine | +0.06 | 89 | 27 |
| #5 | Soniax | -0.94 | 83 | 52 |





