








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1024 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 161 | 9% |
| Smokes | 377 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 681 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 544 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $319,387 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paap ͡(° ͜ʖ ͡°) | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | FyeR | 67% | 78 |
| #3 | Daxi | 61% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paap ͡(° ͜ʖ ͡°) | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | FyeR | 67% | 78 |
| #3 | Daxi | 61% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daxi | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | FyeR | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FyeR | 371 | 0.25 | 9 min |
| #2 | Daxi | 296 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | paap ͡(° ͜ʖ ͡°) | 23 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FyeR | +2.24 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | paap ͡(° ͜ʖ ͡°) | +1.13 | 72 | 75 |
| #3 | Daxi | +0.90 | 77 | 47 |
| #4 | ZiiKo | +0.46 | 83 | 31 |





