








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 88 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2253 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,942 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2103 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1815 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1282 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1742 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $672,909 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 278 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aaronsfury | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | ๑ﭥ | 57% | 60 |
| #3 | Philipek | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | fx | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | NoVa LFT | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๑ﭥ | 7 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Smurfing on my laptop | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | fx | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | jawn pork | 2 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Bobby Critz | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๑ﭥ | 173 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | Bobby Critz | 153 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | NoVa LFT | 89 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #4 | Smurfing on my laptop | 84 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | aaronsfury | 65 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orb1t | +3.61 | 71 | 63 |
| #2 | fx | +2.58 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | aaronsfury | +2.39 | 85 | 69 |
| #4 | Smurfing on my laptop | +2.05 | 82 | 56 |
| #5 | c0ntr01 | +1.35 | 70 | 66 |





