








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 605 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 444 matches | ||
| Faceit | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7394 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,313 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6134 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6165 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5468 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6546 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,969,802 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Cu Sữa | 47% | 51 |
| #15 | raindezed | 46% | 181 |
| #16 | Santoryu Ogi | 44% | 145 |
| #17 | 1eo | 44% | 48 |
| #18 | Zack | 41% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raindezed | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Santoryu Ogi | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Melodic Black | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | ✪ 0hN0ツ | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Golden Receiver | 5 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Santoryu Ogi | 547 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | ✪ 0hN0ツ | 479 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #3 | Melodic Black | 455 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #4 | raindezed | 408 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | Nova | 404 | 0.09 | 10 min |





