










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
502 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 360 | 20% |
| Smokes | 418 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 558 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 435 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $114,098 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucky | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | Wandikk | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | Wandi | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | FlyingPancake | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | quali zenin | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucky | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | Wandikk | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | Wandi | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | FlyingPancake | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | quali zenin | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quali zenin | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Wandikk | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | FlyingPancake | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Wandi | 1 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quali zenin | 127 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | FlyingPancake | 102 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | Lucky | 21 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Wandikk | 20 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Wandi | 15 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wandikk | +2.11 | 84 | 49 |
| #2 | FlyingPancake | +1.68 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | quali zenin | +0.46 | 82 | 61 |
| #4 | Lucky | +0.03 | 66 | 35 |
| #5 | Ta Da | -0.16 | 68 | 52 |





