








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1378 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 415 matches | ||
| Wingman | 91 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8152 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,448 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6653 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6903 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4719 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 6173 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,515,338 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 798 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noLo | 55% | 75 |
| #2 | -D4rky- | 51% | 57 |
| #3 | Manfredini Caprini | 49% | 69 |
| #4 | .spokE | 43% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noLo | 55% | 75 |
| #2 | -D4rky- | 51% | 57 |
| #3 | Manfredini Caprini | 49% | 69 |
| #4 | .spokE | 43% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noLo | 6 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | -D4rky- | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Manfredini Caprini | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -D4rky- | 216 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | noLo | 121 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | .spokE | 99 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Manfredini Caprini | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xIceFox | +2.26 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | noLo | +1.30 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | Manfredini Caprini | +1.15 | 83 | 59 |
| #4 | .spokE | -1.34 | 61 | 55 |
| #5 | -D4rky- | -2.16 | 42 | 52 |





