








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 691 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3964 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,231 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5067 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4591 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3207 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3366 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $876,218 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 627 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Nelly | 48% | 99 |
| #6 | Blesx | 48% | 80 |
| #7 | lilprinter | 46% | 176 |
| #8 | Moutoast | 41% | 110 |
| #9 | white lion | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lilprinter | 590 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | DuStUg | 269 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | Blesx | 247 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Moutoast | 193 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Nelly | 145 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chort | +1.62 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | DuStUg | +0.77 | 59 | 64 |
| #3 | Nelly | +0.64 | 83 | 51 |
| #4 | lilprinter | +0.35 | 75 | 60 |
| #5 | Blesx | -0.44 | 73 | 66 |





