








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 643 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1456 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,662 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3102 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2476 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1974 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1110 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $174,159 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1zu | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | Kukkomies | 47% | 58 |
| #3 | Sadoni | 45% | 51 |
| #4 | Turbo Hampsteri | 45% | 85 |
| #5 | JaP1 | 45% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Turbo Hampsteri | 45% | 85 |
| #5 | JaP1 | 45% | 65 |
| #6 | Gurma | 36% | 22 |
| #7 | Tomosz | 33% | 42 |
| #8 | Rusakko | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Turbo Hampsteri | 17 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | Tomosz | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | JaP1 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Sadoni | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Rusakko | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaP1 | 86 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | Sadoni | 45 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Rusakko | 44 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kukkomies | 41 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Tomosz | 37 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rusakko | +2.39 | 52 | 42 |
| #2 | Sadoni | +2.07 | 56 | 59 |
| #3 | Hero | +0.03 | 19 | 66 |
| #4 | Tomosz | -0.28 | 25 | 49 |
| #5 | JaP1 | -0.67 | 38 | 48 |





