










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2617 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2215 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1770 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1838 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1469 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $345,652 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1283 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | superstar☆ | 88% | 56 |
| #2 | JAERU | 82% | 39 |
| #3 | im on linux (fedora btw) | 74% | 19 |
| #4 | elfte | 72% | 47 |
| #5 | hypocrite | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | superstar☆ | 88% | 56 |
| #2 | JAERU | 82% | 39 |
| #3 | im on linux (fedora btw) | 74% | 19 |
| #4 | elfte | 72% | 47 |
| #5 | hypocrite | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | superstar☆ | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | hypocrite | 4 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | elfte | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | JAERU | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | im on linux (fedora btw) | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | superstar☆ | 67 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | hypocrite | 54 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | elfte | 38 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | JAERU | 17 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | im on linux (fedora btw) | 16 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | superstar☆ | +9.69 | 98 | 49 |
| #2 | hypocrite | -0.32 | 69 | 48 |
| #3 | Boboboi | -0.73 | 53 | 49 |
| #4 | JAERU | -0.79 | 82 | 42 |
| #5 | im on linux (fedora btw) | -0.88 | 86 | 37 |





