








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1839 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2094 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2564 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1615 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1632 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $520,474 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BRS | 49% | 105 |
| #2 | Nesty | 48% | 144 |
| #3 | ORSi | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | comfy | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | SP42KY | 46% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BRS | 49% | 105 |
| #2 | Nesty | 48% | 144 |
| #3 | ORSi | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | comfy | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | SP42KY | 46% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BRS | 11 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | SP42KY | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Nesty | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | comfy | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nesty | 200 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #2 | SP42KY | 143 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | BRS | 137 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | comfy | 49 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | ORSi | 38 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | comfy | +4.39 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | ORSi | +1.89 | 61 | 65 |
| #3 | rhys | +1.17 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | Nesty | -1.37 | 70 | 63 |
| #5 | BRS | -1.43 | 66 | 45 |





