








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2444 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,592 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1182 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1033 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1361 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1016 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $709,848 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goLdNguN | 75% | 28 |
| #2 | tommy2tugs | 73% | 30 |
| #3 | aSc.AFK | 65% | 20 |
| #4 | Vol^w | 63% | 82 |
| #5 | Buckets | 63% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Happy Buckets | +5.11 | 82 | 60 |
| #2 | mokoL | +3.94 | 80 | 73 |
| #3 | carrym3 | +2.39 | 74 | 55 |
| #4 | Vol^w | +2.35 | 74 | 68 |
| #5 | Buckets | +1.65 | 73 | 65 |





