










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 754 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7356 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5941 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6366 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5087 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3422 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,962,696 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1788 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | †☯DragonSnake☯† | 50% | 417 |
| #2 | TehJoke | 50% | 115 |
| #3 | Boss Betch🕸♡🦇 | 48% | 415 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | †☯DragonSnake☯† | 50% | 417 |
| #2 | TehJoke | 50% | 115 |
| #3 | Boss Betch🕸♡🦇 | 48% | 415 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | †☯DragonSnake☯† | 16 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Boss Betch🕸♡🦇 | 5 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | TehJoke | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | †☯DragonSnake☯† | 823 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #2 | Boss Betch🕸♡🦇 | 129 | 0.01 | 4 min |
| #3 | TehJoke | 50 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TehJoke | +1.68 | 51 | 40 |
| #2 | †☯DragonSnake☯† | +0.93 | 82 | 54 |
| #3 | lock in † | +0.91 | 59 | 48 |
| #4 | Boss Betch🕸♡🦇 | -1.65 | 41 | 31 |





