








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 320 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4758 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1914 | 14% |
| Smokes | 4507 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4433 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2797 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,206,597 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 86 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODFJ | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | HomeDepot Glizzy | 9 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Preem | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Banana Joe | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Based Guy | 5 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODFJ | 258 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #2 | Banana Joe | 211 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | the meat man | 166 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | Preem | 118 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | HomeDepot Glizzy | 104 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODFJ | +4.89 | 73 | 67 |
| #2 | Based Guy | +1.63 | 83 | 55 |
| #3 | Banana Joe | -0.06 | 54 | 55 |
| #4 | Michael Jackzyn | -0.11 | 62 | 50 |
| #5 | the meat man | -0.31 | 49 | 67 |





