








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2743 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2405 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4241 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2956 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2045 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,001,545 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ββππβππ | 56% | 66 |
| #2 | πΏπΌπ | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | instaro | 54% | 125 |
| #4 | loading... | 48% | 66 |
| #5 | Prowler | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ββππβππ | 56% | 66 |
| #2 | πΏπΌπ | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | instaro | 54% | 125 |
| #4 | loading... | 48% | 66 |
| #5 | Prowler | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | instaro | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | πΏπΌπ | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | loading... | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ββππβππ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Prowler | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | instaro | 197 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #2 | ββππβππ | 196 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | loading... | 162 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Prowler | 78 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | πΏπΌπ | 64 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaCk HoFfMaN | +2.78 | 56 | 75 |
| #2 | instaro | +0.66 | 55 | 64 |
| #3 | Prowler | -0.65 | 39 | 66 |
| #4 | ββππβππ | -1.92 | 34 | 56 |
| #5 | loading... | -2.49 | 44 | 59 |





