








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 682 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3742 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,952 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2608 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2316 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1163 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1865 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $811,676 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpiN | 78% | 23 |
| #2 | b M o 64.xe *MGK | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | _Dx3 | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | Richard David Precht | 55% | 148 |
| #5 | fav | 54% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fav | 14 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | b M o 64.xe *MGK | 11 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Richard David Precht | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | SpiN | 3 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | _Dx3 | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b M o 64.xe *MGK | 394 | 0.25 | 11 min |
| #2 | fav | 268 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Richard David Precht | 115 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #4 | SpiN | 115 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | _Dx3 | 45 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLuXRioT | +4.14 | 91 | 56 |
| #2 | b M o 64.xe *MGK | +1.04 | 81 | 67 |
| #3 | SpiN | +0.68 | 79 | 74 |
| #4 | fav | -1.70 | 67 | 52 |
| #5 | _Dx3 | -1.81 | 36 | 59 |





