








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 180 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1763 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,252 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 941 | 29% |
| Smokes | 786 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 709 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 816 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $443,208 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StaubWedel | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Die Wunderharke 5000! | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | Nik | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | Cross | 49% | 70 |
| #5 | hakuna_matata_0805 | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AufSwiffer | +8.97 | 90 | 66 |
| #2 | StaubWedel | +4.64 | 98 | 40 |
| #3 | Die Wunderharke 5000! | +1.92 | 44 | 50 |
| #4 | alex | +1.80 | 37 | 49 |
| #5 | Nik | -0.05 | 56 | 24 |





