








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3874 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2691 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2930 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2906 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2791 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $794,928 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 256 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaajo linnonmaa | 57% | 49 |
| #2 | Dimitri | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | jykäboya | 46% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaajo linnonmaa | 57% | 49 |
| #2 | Dimitri | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | jykäboya | 46% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaajo linnonmaa | 8 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | jykäboya | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaajo linnonmaa | 133 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | jykäboya | 117 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | Dimitri | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jari | +2.78 | 74 | 64 |
| #2 | Dimitri | +0.48 | 79 | 52 |
| #3 | jaajo linnonmaa | -1.55 | 62 | 64 |
| #4 | jykäboya | -3.65 | 49 | 53 |





