








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 137 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2349 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,135 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1524 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1805 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 989 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1817 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $799,779 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 307 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaack ツ | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | trouzzyy | 51% | 89 |
| #3 | Ryan | 45% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaack ツ | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | trouzzyy | 51% | 89 |
| #3 | Ryan | 45% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trouzzyy | 16 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Ryan | 8 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | jaack ツ | 6 | 0.0119 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trouzzyy | 355 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | Ryan | 309 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | jaack ツ | 150 | 0.30 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trouzzyy | +5.61 | 92 | 61 |
| #2 | jaack ツ | +1.87 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | Premier Joseph Stalin | -0.52 | 71 | 48 |
| #4 | Ryan | -0.72 | 72 | 50 |





