








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 475 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 97 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5459 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,708 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3965 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4638 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3644 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2461 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,553,388 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4PRENT1CE™ | 51% | 74 |
| #2 | Jean "Baas" Oosthuizen™ | 50% | 66 |
| #3 | BosMossel | 48% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4PRENT1CE™ | 51% | 74 |
| #2 | Jean "Baas" Oosthuizen™ | 50% | 66 |
| #3 | BosMossel | 48% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jean "Baas" Oosthuizen™ | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | 4PRENT1CE™ | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | BosMossel | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4PRENT1CE™ | 407 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #2 | Jean "Baas" Oosthuizen™ | 258 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | BosMossel | 85 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | csgoat (Twitch - csgoated99) | +1.94 | 89 | 58 |
| #2 | 4PRENT1CE™ | +1.67 | 75 | 62 |
| #3 | Jean "Baas" Oosthuizen™ | -0.90 | 63 | 61 |
| #4 | BosMossel | -1.99 | 74 | 41 |





