








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 319 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4770 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,118 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6152 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7264 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3648 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 6054 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $658,332 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acey Poo | 45% | 42 |
| #2 | Sikcnasty ❟❛❟ | 40% | 55 |
| #3 | KS_Reign | 37% | 27 |
| #4 | Boido | 37% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acey Poo | 45% | 42 |
| #2 | Sikcnasty ❟❛❟ | 40% | 55 |
| #3 | KS_Reign | 37% | 27 |
| #4 | Boido | 37% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boido | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Sikcnasty ❟❛❟ | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | KS_Reign | 4 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | Acey Poo | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acey Poo | 246 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| #2 | Sikcnasty ❟❛❟ | 221 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | Boido | 109 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | KS_Reign | 104 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keoni | +1.76 | 80 | 66 |
| #2 | Sikcnasty ❟❛❟ | +0.94 | 67 | 51 |
| #3 | Acey Poo | -0.86 | 57 | 69 |
| #4 | Boido | -1.28 | 50 | 56 |
| #5 | KS_Reign | -3.01 | 49 | 53 |





