








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 752 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 266 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3156 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1916 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1455 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2437 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1119 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,813,859 of utility $262 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | 54% | 215 |
| #2 | enceladus | 41% | 44 |
| #3 | Crémé De La Crémé | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | 54% | 215 |
| #2 | enceladus | 41% | 44 |
| #3 | Crémé De La Crémé | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Crémé De La Crémé | 3 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | 734 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | enceladus | 66 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Crémé De La Crémé | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | +2.79 | 85 | 66 |
| #2 | enceladus | -1.21 | 55 | 62 |
| #3 | Antique | KBM | -1.53 | 72 | 52 |
| #4 | Crémé De La Crémé | -1.76 | 75 | 59 |





