








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
243 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 740 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 170 | 23% |
| Smokes | 148 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 214 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 208 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $81,934 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !!! BoSsMaN !!! | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | St1tch | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | SarinGas | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | DeCo Nanya | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | Killa | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | St1tch | 2 | 0.0116 |
| #2 | Nihilus | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Finished | 90 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #2 | Nihilus | 44 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | St1tch | 31 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | DeCo Nanya | 20 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Killa | 13 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nihilus | +4.27 | 63 | 61 |
| #2 | St1tch | +3.85 | 76 | 64 |
| #3 | SarinGas | +2.07 | 59 | 62 |
| #4 | !!! BoSsMaN !!! | +1.14 | 48 | 28 |
| #5 | GarBster | +1.09 | 71 | 63 |





