








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,323 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 383 | 29% |
| Smokes | 116 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 539 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 285 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $95,979 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Average Workout Enjoyer | 46% | 48 |
| #2 | Napoleon Zervas | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | christos_aris | 40% | 53 |
| #4 | Da Vinci | 38% | 26 |
| #5 | Joshua | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Average Workout Enjoyer | 46% | 48 |
| #2 | Napoleon Zervas | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | christos_aris | 40% | 53 |
| #4 | Da Vinci | 38% | 26 |
| #5 | Joshua | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | christos_aris | 13 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | Joshua | 5 | 0.0109 |
| #3 | Average Workout Enjoyer | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Da Vinci | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | christos_aris | 200 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | Average Workout Enjoyer | 127 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Da Vinci | 36 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Joshua | 28 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Napoleon Zervas | 6 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Average Workout Enjoyer | +2.72 | 46 | 61 |
| #2 | Thadon | +0.14 | 37 | 54 |
| #3 | Napoleon Zervas | -0.09 | 37 | 41 |
| #4 | Da Vinci | -2.86 | 15 | 59 |
| #5 | christos_aris | -2.89 | 25 | 65 |





