








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
233 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,070 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 281 | 26% |
| Smokes | 253 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 346 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 190 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $63,274 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dark*tA*mEre* | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Why is this spicy? | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | qcmonetteqc | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | Ninja Kitten | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dark*tA*mEre* | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Why is this spicy? | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | qcmonetteqc | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | Ninja Kitten | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Why is this spicy? | 4 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | Dark*tA*mEre* | 2 | 0.0127 |
| #3 | qcmonetteqc | 1 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | Ninja Kitten | 1 | 0.0127 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Why is this spicy? | 56 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | Dark*tA*mEre* | 20 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #3 | Ninja Kitten | 7 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | qcmonetteqc | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Why is this spicy? | +4.82 | 79 | 55 |
| #2 | Ninja Kitten | +4.78 | 93 | 49 |
| #3 | qcmonetteqc | +0.17 | 68 | 19 |
| #4 | Dark*tA*mEre* | -0.32 | 27 | 50 |
| #5 | skylegend | -3.83 | 29 | 36 |





