










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,563 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 614 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1448 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1339 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1162 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $565,574 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 347 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SYRΞ | 9 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | Raoul Duke | 5 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | veiqq | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | TRALALERO TRALALA | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | syre | 3 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ma1Lz ツ | 218 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | syre | 158 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #3 | SYRΞ | 129 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | jonkler | 127 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | veiqq | 126 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jonkler | +4.52 | 83 | 68 |
| #2 | TRALALERO TRALALA | +3.85 | 59 | 62 |
| #3 | Raoul Duke | +3.57 | 84 | 62 |
| #4 | SYRΞ | +2.92 | 68 | 67 |
| #5 | Ma1Lz ツ | +2.74 | 89 | 67 |





