








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,705 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 678 | 25% |
| Smokes | 844 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 608 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 575 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,922 of utility $227 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | BokuWaTamago | 44% | 9 |
| #12 | GG | 38% | 8 |
| #13 | donplayplay | 33% | 33 |
| #14 | Capt Oi! | 17% | 6 |
| #15 | Tropik | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hagym.root | +2.83 | 86 | 48 |
| #2 | GG | +1.42 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | Snooooooozerrrrr | +1.13 | 59 | 67 |
| #4 | Nihongoh | +0.74 | 64 | 65 |
| #5 | ex-con-cat | +0.36 | 61 | 71 |





